Here are some quotes on fear and facing fears that I wish Lauren Elizabeth Kelley, the sweet, freckled, redhead I love would read and learn from.
1) Abraham Maslow, psychologist: “I have learned the novice can often see things that the expert overlooks. All that is necessary is not to be afraid of making mistakes, or of appearing naive.”
2) Bill Cosby, comedian: “Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.”
3) Gandhi, spiritual/political leader: “The enemy is fear. We think it is hate; but, it is fear.”
4) Winston Churchill, UK politician. statesman; former British Prime Minister: “When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.”
5) Judy Blume, author: “Each of us must confront our own fears, must come face to face with them. How we handle our fears will determine where we go with the rest of our lives. To experience adventure or to be limited by the fear of it.”
6) Don Miguel Ruiz, author, speaker, Shaman: “Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive—the risk to be alive and express what we really are.”
7) Ralph Waldo Emerson, essayist, poet, philosopher: “When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.”
8) Dale Carnegie, speaker, writer: “Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”
9) Oprah Winfrey, television pioneer, actress/producer: “The thing you fear most has no power. Your fear of it is what has the power. Facing the truth really will set you free.”
10) Henry Ford, US indistrialist: “One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn’t do.”
11) Frank Sinatra, singer, actor: “Fear is the enemy of logic.”
12) Colin Powell, US statesman; four-star general: “Don’t take counsel of your fears or naysayers.”
13) Franklin D. Roosevelt, 32nd US President: “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”
I think Judy Blume is right, in that if Lauren Elizabeth Kelley does not face her fears—if Lauren Elizabeth Kelley does not handle them—she will be limited for the rest of her life. Her fears and insecurities are what give her addictions the hold over her that they have. Facing her fears will give her the ability to fight her addictions.
Don Miguel Ruiz is also correct, because I think that Lauren Elizabeth Kelley’s greatest fear isn’t death—but living. Lauren Elizabeth Kelley said she loved me in two different languages dozens of times the week we were talking about having a future together, about having Asians with freckles that our children would be and getting married. Yet, we haven’t started on that future because I think Lauren Elizabeth Kelley is too afraid of living and following her heart’s desires.
I know Oprah is right. Facing the truth—the hard, ugly, truths that I have been telling Lauren Elizabeth Kelley for the past seventeen months will set her free—set her free of her addictions, set her free to start on the future we both want together.
I hope that my beloved Lauren Elizabeth Kelley finds something in them that will help her face the fears and insecurities that have been giving her addictions their strength and control over the amazing woman I love so much. No matter what else happens, I will always love her and care for her. Love is eternal and she knows this is what I believe. I have loved Lauren Elizabeth Kelley all of her life and I always will. I never stopped being her friend, caring about her or loving her. I never stopped believing in the amazing woman I love, trusting her or having faith in how strong, smart and stubborn she is.
God Bless you Lauren Elizabeth.
May God watch over you and protect you from all harm—even that you cause yourself.
I hope God gives you the strength to fight your addictions and the wisdom to see the truth about what the alcohol and drugs are doing to you.
I pray that God grants you the serenity and peace you will need to love yourself once again and to forgive yourself for the things your addictions have made you do.
I ask that God helps you find your way back to being the amazing, beautiful, intelligent, feisty, stubborn, strong, and devout woman He wants you to be.
Finally, may He grant you the ability to see yourself as I do and let you remember who we are to each other; let you remember the years of friendship, love and devotion we once shared; and give you the strength to make amends so we can start the future together we talked about last June.
All this in Jesus’s name I pray.
Amen.